I got a call this morning from Kayla's surgeon's office asking me if I could call them before we take off to Syracuse.  The only thing I thought to ask was if Kayla's surgery was going to be postponed.  All they could tell me is that they weren't sure.  After that phone call I was stressed out of my mind and just felt sick to my stomach.

We have already postponed her surgery once because she was sick... but we waited until the day before we had to leave to know if it was postponed for sure.  This time we are sitting here waiting to hear the day of travel.  I have been stressing about her surgery ever since we found out about it.  I know it needs to be done and stressing isn't any good, but I can't do anything else.  But the past two nights, I have not really slept, and if I did sleep, I was dreaming about her surgery.  I'm just so nervous, terrified, sad...

At the end of the work day, I couldn't take it any more and I called our Dr's nurse back.  She is sooo very sweet and didn't seem bothered by me at all.  She even gave me her personal number so I didn't have to call the office and get any random nurse.  She listened to my concerns and told me she would call me back as soon as our Dr was done with his last patient.  After an hour of waiting to hear back, I was just too crazy about the whole situation, and I called back.  And I know that they are sooo super busy, and I felt awful for calling them back but I'm a nut case right now... :( The nurse still did not seem bothered and was very helpful! She got me right through to our Dr.  The whole issue is that our Dr is having a biopsy done on his foot tonight and isn't sure he'll be able to perform surgery on Friday.  He told me he'd have his nurse call me first thing in the morning to let me know if we should head down or not.  And he knows that we really want him to do the surgery-

So with that huge long story you probably didn't care to read... we are not sure if we are going to Syracuse tomorrow or not.  Our Dr did mention maybe having to postpone til Monday or Tuesday- could be Thursday or it could still be this Friday.  We just aren't sure what's happening yet.  Which is so hard!  I just need her to have the surgery so I can stop thinking/stressing and stop being a nut case and help get her through the recovery.

However, this morning before the phone call, Danielle, a great friend, surprised me with a great gift that my co-workers in Banford contributed to.  So very kind!!!  So thank you Banford!  Then a friend, Missy Lawrence, came into my room and gave me a gift to give to Kayla!  Kayla won't get them until after her surgery as one of the gifts had stickers in it... she LOVES stickers. :) So thank you Missy!  <3 You are too sweet!!

Even tho I think she is working harder to breathe, she can still run "so fast".  She had a great time running back and forth saying "I so fast... so fast"

Kayla is doing much better but not well enough for her surgery on Thursday.  The surgeon's office read over our pediatricians notes on Kayla's last two visits, and decided it was best to postpone the surgery a week.  She has been rescheduled for Friday, May 13.  (I know.. Friday the 13th... UGH!) However, my husbands logic is this:  Kayla... unlucky for having to have surgery AGAIN, Friday the 13th... unlucky day, two negatives equal a positive... so Kayla's surgery is going to go amazingly well and she will recover better and stronger than ever! :)

It will be hard to wait another week for surgery- the anticipation is killing me!  I'm stressed about absolutely everything and anything!  I stress about what to bring, my lesson plans, Kayla hating me when she wakes up, Kayla being disappointed that it's ME who is staying with her at the hospital (daddy has to work :( ), Kayla crying with the stitches (it's freaks me out), the pain she'll be in, her not wanting to sit still, bowel obstruction, reflux returning, Kayla getting even WORSE at eating (ugh), Lily forgetting who I am, money, I mean everything... it's been a stressful month, and another week has been added on.  My co-workers, friends and family must hate me by now.. I've got to be the most annoying, grumpy person ever.  I'm sorry ... :-/

Anyway- so for those who have been wondering, Kayla is doing much better. Just not well enough for such a procedure.  I'm very thankful that they did not postpone longer than a week, and I'm also thankful it was postponed as now I have two days I get off from work w/o having to take them off.  I'm already taking 11 days, 10 w/o pay... and then when I would be able to return, we have that friday and monday off. :) I am also thankful for the new date because her Nina and Papa can come visit now. But a little sad because that week would have been the recovery week...

Staying positive- and trying not to stress over it all, but it's been hard.

Thanks to a great friend from work, Kayla has two very cute hospital gowns.  This is one of them... it has snap shoulders and a tie back all the way down.  It's perfect... she LOVES it!!! She also has some "dance shoes" slippers from her Aunt Meghan and Uncle Matt that matched this gown perfectly.  She danced around for at least 10 min in this outfit. 

Kayla's patch is pushing on her lung and making it harder for her to breathe.  She isn't panting or anything like that, but our ped. said she could tell she was working harder... and at the very moment, to make things more complicated, she also has a cold... both of which are making it harder for her to breathe.  If you've never met her/seen her, you'd never know.  

Not only is this cold making her work harder to breathe, but it also may mean we need to postpone surgery.  I REALLY do not want to, but I'd prefer she'd be 100% healthy before going under!  However, after a doctor tells you that she's working harder to breathe... you want that fixed immediately whether they see it as an emergency or not.  We are still praying that she recooperates before Wednesday of next week.  

May 5th is the surgery date.  We hope we can keep it... but we'll see.  If we have to postpone, I'm hoping we can postpone a week, not several..! 

We would like to thank all who have sent Kayla gifts... she has LOVED everything that has come in the mail and all will make her stay at the hospital much easier. We appreciate EVERYTHING and can not thank you enough for trying to make our girl a little happier there.  We would also like to thank all who have prayed for Kayla! We appreciate your good thoughts towards her rough time.  <3

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